I think of disappointment as the feeling I get when I get what I want — sort of. The image for me that looms large is being in eighth grade and winning a raffle first prize. The second prize was a stereo record player. The third and fourth prizes were something like tools or school…
A group of us were recently told that there is nothing quite so unappealing to young adults as a bunch of discouraged-looking old people. To which I replied in sotto voce, “There is nothing quite so discouraging as a group of young adults dependent on how we look to them.” Still, I get the point.…
An old friend of mine and I used to joke about levels of discouragement like they were circles in Dante’s Inferno. The absolute lowest level, we decided, was resignation, not despair. With despair, one still looks back at what is lost to us. Resignation even quits looking back. We will never have what we want,…
“Does one actually need to convert to secular Judaism?” That, from my friend Bonnie after I asked her if I should convert, having discovered I am part Jewish, but was raised Catholic. The funny part is that her question was sincere. She suggested that we make a series of dinner reservations instead. Still, at the…
When I left the friary at age 17, I had completed all of the required credits to graduate from high school, but I lacked a course in U.S. History. I decided to go to a public high school for two semesters while working part time at nights. This would give me an opportunity to acclimate…
In 1962, I entered a friary to train to be a Capuchin. There was sort of hullabaloo about it for the year prior to my departure. My father seemed sort of proud of the thought of me going into religious life, but my mother was not as keen on it. First, I was not going…
My journey to humanism from religion seems in many ways to be quite linear, even direct. I was baptized within two weeks of my birth and spent the next two decades as a regular adherent to Catholic traditions. From there I went to the Episcopal Church and the Evangelical Lutheran Church of America. Then, despite…
My friend Tom and I have talked about the “lobster effect” of religious upbringing. Initially the environment feels pretty good, safe and protective. Then eventually things heat up until self-doubt and self-hate come to a boiling point. Then, like a lobster in the pot, you are a goner. I think of my early days in…
Next Monday, March 7, my friend Tom and I will again be blogging about a common topic. Since I am about a quarter century Tom’s senior, we have different perspectives on many issues but have been frequently surprised that we have come to many of the same conclusions. Tandem writing has been intellectually stimulating to…
By waiting you wait more. Every waiting day makes your life a little less. Every lonely day makes you a little smaller. Every day you put off your life makes you less capable of living it. ― Ann Brashares, Sisterhood Everlasting There is a museum in Toronto with an excellent collection of Asian art, much…
Creating Community for Everyone 