I am too intelligent, too demanding, and too resourceful for anyone to be able to take charge of me entirely. – Simone de Beauvoir Three children. Two miscarriages, at least. A shaky marriage. A will born for survival in an adolescent girl, now a woman who would not be controlled. She needed to work to…
My late husband Paul was an artist. When we were alone, I sometimes sang to him these lyrics that Joni Mitchell penned sometime before 1970: Oh I am a lonely painter I live in a box of paints I’m frightened by the devil And I’m drawn to those ones that ain’t afraid I remember that…
Prayer for a New Mother The things she knew, let her forget again- The voices in the sky, the fear, the cold, The gaping shepherds, and the queer old men Piling their clumsy gifts of foreign gold. Let her have laughter with her little one; Teach her the endless, tuneless songs to sing, Grant her…
I am a big fan of giving thanks, specific appreciations, and expressing delight. I set up meetings so that their last five minutes or so are devoted to creating the opportunity to say what we learned from each other or what we appreciated. I find that my work is best when I wrap my mind…
My students are familiar with my comments and jokes about my not being easy. I expect, for example, that they challenge themselves to identify as students in contrast to merely being “in school” (identity vs location). I expect them to interact with the 40 other people in the room. Shy? Me, too! Tough. Get to…
For the past few weeks I have not written blog posts or meatier items on Facebook. I reasoned that anything besides kittens and kids would gain little traction (after all, we do need some respite from The Donald) or was being covered elsewhere by people more articulate than I (or at least wearing pants suits). Further,…
Back in the days when we actually watched television shows at their scheduled times, Friends was the bomb. Its finale in 2004 was viewed by more than 50 million people, making it among the top watched television episodes in history and the top in that decade. We knew people whose social lives before that final episode…
Ironically, one of the tasks for those who succeed the baby boomers is to restore idealism. The great challenge of our moment is the crisis of isolation and fragmentation, the need to rebind the fabric of a society that has been torn by selfishness, cynicism, distrust and autonomy. — David Brooks, The Death…
My diet has changed over the years. I am much less likely to eat chocolate, consume ice cream, or use butter than I did decades ago. These changes did not occur because I have had two heart attacks, but rather because I, like you, listened to the news that lower fat intake improves our health…
Just hours ago, I wrote a dear friend, “I respectfully ask that you reconsider our relationship and be sure the one we have matches the one you want. If it does not, please consider a redesign.” I added, “I can be a forever friend.” Perhaps because of Paul’s death a year and half ago and…
Creating Community for Everyone 